Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
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Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.
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Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.
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Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris
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Chuck Norris could have any woman he wants, but he has never had sex. He only masturbates because the only person good enough to have sex with Chuck is Chuck.
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Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Chuck Norris
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If Chuck Norris is late, time better slow the fuck down.
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