Soul - "Stay awake to the ways of the world, the shit is deep"

Soul - "Stay awake to the ways of the world, the shit is deep"



Hey, don't close your eyes just yet,


I read we're asleep for 23 years of our lives
only thing is it feels like i've slept through the first 23 years of my life
countin on the decisions of others to help in steering me right
sleep through the day and run scared through the night
won't deceive you but appearances might scared as hell but you won't
see fear in my eyes just yourself standing there lookin very surprised
lookin back at a dude barely alive
just know that indifference is laughs anger and tears in disguise
a veneer i devised as a selfdefense of sorts of course it helped immensely
but as of late i've felt desensitised...while seeming mellow to you guys
my personal hell intensified wish to start the day feeling well and energized
but looking in the mirror i just see a shell with empty eyes
imagine constantly sporting a sarcastically raised eyebrow
watching other peoples dreams manifest from the window of my hideout
cruising shallow waters without the guidance of a lighthouse
drifting, yes, but you'd think i'd gotten somewhere by now
things were going smoothly what i gotta fight now?
caged, facing an animal and can't call a time out
when i cry out the statement related in the faces indicate that i should pipe down
no team to intervene when it's nightnight & lights out
I feel the animal wrangling from sidemount skillfully taking my back now
pinning me down trying to get me to tap out
holding me choking me tight after laying the smackdown
killing myself to stay awake it would be so much easier to just blackout...
but i can't back down i carry even heavier stones
that have yet to be thrown in this glass house
flat out pull the mask down and show you but you won't see
you don't see the blackcloud just the cracks from a class clown
so i laugh now and cry alcohol with my people later
where I see the sad pieces of truth my dreams are made of
if you knew my secrets maybe it'd give you a different view of me
but i don't give you the opportunity begging this indifference not to ruin me
from feelings i sought immunity really i thought it cool to be
cold 'for i realized that if you are then really you not a human being
thinking of how i wish i could love but i can't
still damaged from when i held the pieces of my broken heart in my bloody hands
puzzled the pieces back together wrong and became another man
not askin for forgiveness but for another chance please understand
i would trade in my goals for the sake of my soul but i'm afraid to let go
still looking for something immaterial in the race for the gold
still the babyfaced boy chasing the crows away in the cold
standing beneath the hoop looking up waiting to grow
wating to break way from the mold
but never got the last laugh cus he was to busy makin the jokes
so i'm told funny, hysterical actually but a bit careless
but i'm not... i just care less
and apparently i'm mysterious a disparaged dick barley
able to get serious hate to admit it, but it's merited..
therefore I sit here and miss Erik
it's wierd, yes, but i know he's here still cus these are his lyrics
it belongs to the kid with a face without a mask singed into it
haven't done half the things he used to think of doing
can't really say why but sometimes it's difficult to muster a simple movement
now smiles are a quiet combination of drinks and two-steps
don't know what that means haven't had the time to think it through yet
but the only good memories i got are linked to music
makin playlist while my boy's blowin indo circles
getting high watching infomercials
the window curtain drawn shut so the world won't wake me
only took the jobs folk gave me
got older and lost my innocence
a lost soldier who never fought for anything
they say don't stand for nothing you'll fall for anything
but fuck it I'd rather lay down and watch oprah
feel happiest when I'm not sober Even though I'm not 'posed to
treading on thin ice leaning on a hot poker
got to light up with something, you know pot smokers
losin myself to popculture where the common man
either pops champagne pops pills or pops toasters
forced to join the flock of grown ups and job goers but what if i go back
to sleep one morning and just not show up would they not notice?
tryin to live the dream but when i was a snotnose
sittin on my pops shoulders my dreams seemed alot closer
had the potential to be a posterchild
but now i don't know i think they're supposed to smile
and i don't see too much to smile about
i see these kens & barbies & struggle with keepin my genetically manipulated sallad down
and i don't know what society wants from me
when i'm not what society wants or need
i see a society governed by want and greed
a society of the likes i'd rather wander free..


If you made it this far, I appreciate it.

one.